kumaradosha reblogged your post: kumaradosha: allheliabreaksloose: softowl: …
She was stalked and harassed into getting a tumblr? I’m not even arguing that she chose to get all this attention. The…Okay, she had a tumblr before this started. And then people stalked Andrew until they found a sliver of evidence of Softowl’s internet presence and then they followed and harassed and harangued her and NEVER STOPPED.
So, you’re saying that if she doesn’t want this, she shouldn’t have a tumblr? Fuck you, SHE doesn’t need to do anything, it’s the people who are fucking around and being shitheads and stalking her that needs to change.
Nobody should have to deal with this and even if she deleted her tumblr? Guess what, she’d STILL be stalked and harassed. You understand nothing, you self righteous child.
“Fuck you, SHE doesn’t need to do anything, it’s the people who are fucking around and being shitheads and stalking her that needs to change.”
And when they DON’T change because they’re jerks, she will still have the same problem. Suggesting the ideal is nice and all, but people have to deal with problems based on reality. And the reality is that people are not going to stop being evil over the internet.
(Note: This isn’t a reply to this specific post just what you’ve said about this situation in general. The stuff that’s in parentheses is where I’m getting what you’re saying even if they’re not the words you’re using.)
You know I’ve got to say that after reading through all of your replies that you have shown little to no introspection! You’re told that you’re acting rude and condescending, and then yes, you do say “I’m sorry”, but it’s done in a rude/condescending manner or in a post that’s just as rude and condescending as your first one. (Adding things like “Sheesh.” at the end of a response, reiterating your original point as though no one understood what you were trying to say and also that your advice was a truly groundbreaking thing that no one could have possibly considered before!) So you may have used the words “I’m sorry” but it’s basically impossible to accept that you actually are and aren’t just being even more patronizing when you didn’t actually say it with the words surrounding that little phrase.
Furthermore, you aren’t accepting the responsibility for having come off as patronizing. You’re saying “I’m sorry that you took my argument the wrong way???? did you even read what i wrote?????????????? look I’m totally just being super helpful GOSH you’re just overreacting!!!!! [sic]” (you’ve made quite a few mentions that you were just trying to be helpful, that you definitely did not mean for others to take it they way they did, that they didn’t actually read your responses at all and are putting words in your mouth, and that their response is disproportionate). So rather than take a step back and trying to think about where you may have erred for people to have developed such an opinion, you kept making posts that really imply that you feel as though none of the problem lies on you, but solely on others, who are just not reading your posts the way you read them. That’s pretty uncool.
And after you don’t seem try to make what can be read as a sincere apology, you just tried to play yourself as a victim. (There was a post that someone made about being mortified about Softowl being threatened as she said she was and your response was “Wait… are you talking to ME?” and acting offended that they would say such things about you, which really shows that you are a person who definitely needed to shove your way into that and make it look like they were attacking you when they bolded everything that they were specifically referring to in Softowl’s post, and even removed what you had written. And you seem fond of the concept of “shooting the messenger” describing you being attacked for simply saying the cold hard truth thereby completely circumventing the need to even consider that you may be out of line, which also carries the wonderful implication that everyone who is upset with your behaviour is upset because they’re irrationally avoiding the truth that you, being so enlightened, are choosing to grace them with.)
Basically, your apologies would probably be taken seriously by others if you took it seriously too. Your behaviour during/after your ‘apologies’ was the same as beforehand, you don’t seem to care to take responsibility for anything you’ve said, and you’re also trying to play yourself up as a victim. None of this is cool at all.
(Source: raisehelia)
